A relationship should be one where you’re not afraid and have the courage to speak the truth. Not with an intention to hurt but with an understanding that it’s ok to be wrong. With a confidence that the person will accept you and understand.
You acknowledge how bad it can feel when you speak your heart out but you know you’re appreciated. You feel the depth of hurt it will cause and you make sure not to ease any of the pain. The only resolve that you make is not to cause such a suffering again, for in speaking truth the pain is more yours than theirs. The only thing you expect from them is faith that’ll you improve.
Why speaking the truth is hard?
Firstly, we don’t want to face the consequences of our actions. If you think before you do anything. Question yourself and ask if you are you willing to accept whatever happens as a result of this? Then sure, go ahead and do it. If you are not sure and still do that, it’ll cause a lot of misery. Secondly, we are afraid to hurt someone we love. And resorting to lie is like a sweet poison. It’ll feel like you’re doing the right but it’s not. The choices you made before is now ready to give its fruits. If you acted selfishly the fruits will undoubtedly taste bitter. That is the law of nature!
Why listening to the truth is difficult?
Truth is most of the times harsh and it hurts. We have a mental image of everyone and if any action they do doesn’t conform to that image we get scared and confused. It’s related to the innate nature of ours to have certainty and have deterministic outcomes in life, which is impossible. There’s also our bias. We have a different scale for oneself and a different scale for other people in our life. In our scale, our mistakes are made lighter and mistakes of others are huge. This has to be undone. We all make mistakes and if we see and understand people in the same light it’ll be best. Realise that we can make the same mistakes too, it’s all human and possible.
This is easily said than done. I hope I’m able to bring some changes from here in my life. :)